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We take Dress Down Friday seriously at Parlour.

Image by poohchisa tunsiri from Pixabay

CN: Parlour’s CEO has a top-flight lawyer on retainer to deal with anyone who suggests there is drug-assisted mind control in this story.

I’m usually nervous at job interviews, but not this time: Parlour is famous for being the friendliest, most relaxed tech business in the country, and I’ve been headhunted by their HR chief, who happens to be my best friend’s mum. Petra says I’m perfect for the role, that all I have to do is act professional and I’ll impress Hunter.

Hunter. That’s my new boss, hopefully. My instinct is to call him Mr Wolff, because he’s the CEO, but fortunately there’s no hierarchy in his company, and no deference: people have different roles but every job is equally important, so Hunter insists on first names all round. That’s good, because I couldn’t call him Mr Wolff and keep a straight face. Apart from wanting to ask him what time it is, Wolff is just too incongruous a name for this short, chubby, balding beta male.

There’s no danger of anyone sleeping their way to the top of Parlour’s non-existent hierarchy: Hunter is a singularly unattractive man. He’s not even rich, because he refuses to pay himself more than ten times the salary of his lowest paid employees. That’s good for his workforce, but all the billionaire tech start-up guys swan around…